Change: LaughsWithWolves republished the Dec 16 2006, 8:44 AM EST version by Anonymous Jan 16 2007, 10:46 PM EST

Change:  The Dalai Lama walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." -- funnyr.com Why do they bother saying "raw" sewage? Do some people cook that stuff? (George Carlin)People in hell...where do they tell someone to go? (Red Skelton)I didn't invent   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 507)

Change: People in hell...where do they tell someone to go? (Red Skelton)I didn't invent the hypothetical situation, but let's just suppose for a second that I did. (Auggie Cook)Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He laid awake nights wondering if there really is a dog. (unknown   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 473)

Change:  I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth. (Janeane Garofalo) Computers make it easy to do a lot   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 436)

Change: dirty jokesLast night I went to a 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, "Hey, the sign says you're open 24 hours!" He goes: "Not in a row!" (Steven Wright)A man goes to a   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 346)

Change: He laid awake nights wondering if there really IS a dog.Last night I went to a 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, "Hey, the sign says you're open 24 hours!" He goes: "Not in a row!" (Steven Wright)   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 343)

Change: (Woody Allen ? - at the end of the film "Annie Hall")I knew these Siamese twins. They moved to England, so the other one could drive. (Steven Wright)I bet the main reason the police keep people away   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 324)

Change: Click EasyEdit to add your own existential zingers.Last night I went to a 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, "Hey, the sign says you're open 24 hours!" He goes: "Not in a row!" (Steven Wright)A man   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 315)

Change: I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then, when somebody comes up, act like they just woke up and go, "What was that?!" (Jack Handey) I was   View changes from previous version. (Word count: 307)